When I was pregnant with my son, I was overjoyed and afraid because I lost my first pregnancy. I prayed every night for my little unborn baby boy to be okay. When his growth and the pregnancy was progressing smoothly, I decided I wanted to have an unmedicated birth. My family was shocked. “Why do you want to birth in pain? With an epidural you can enjoy yourself more.” I wanted something different that no one in my family except once with my grandma has tried. I wanted to have a good birth.

I was already affiliated with Dr. Damon Cobb whose practice is in San Diego. He was a wonderful natural-minded doctor that cared for the type of birth that you as a mother would want. So, I started with a hospital birth. Fears still would plague me from time to time, but my pregnancy was very smooth. Didn't even get sick once. My last 4 months of pregnancy, I took a birth class with my husband Peter. The birth course I took was Mama Natural. This birth course gave me all the knowledge that I needed to prepare for a healthy birth except, I didn't have a doula. Didn't know there was such a thing.

The pricing of doulas surprised me, but I knew I wanted someone that was knowledgeable about comfort measures during the stages of birth. I searched on doula match and found Rosie Peterson of Serenity blessings. I began to cry. Feeling in my heart that God was calling me to this woman to help me. I named my first child's middle name that I lost Serenity. I called her and had two appointments with her before the big day. She was compassionate, kind, gentle, soft, and a lover of Jesus.

She described birth as a labyrinth. Where you know there is an end but there is so many twists and turns. You feel so close but yet you have so far to go. Then when you feel the most far away, is when your baby is arriving. I was so thankful to God how my labor turned out. On Easter Sunday, my water started to leak. I was supposed to sing for Saint Gabriel's but I had to leave right before mass. I called my doctor and went over to the hospital with my husband around 11 in the morning. They confirmed that it was my amniotic fluid and so I stayed.

When first arriving, I felt no pain. I felt like something was happening but it was so gradual and the pain began to increase slowly as the hours ticked by. My doctor felt like I was not progressing fast enough and wanted to induce me by 3 in the morning. I called Rosie. She drove over to give me my options and said, “I would have had you labor at home before going to the hospital.” So, I got permission by Dr. Cobb to leave which I was so thankful for. It was around 7 or 8 in the evening when I left and was about a pain level of 7.

I called my parents saying we were driving home. Once we got home, Rosie said let me know if it starts to pick up. Once we were settled into our bed, I started to pray. “God, please let there be no complications, no stress, and if I have to go through the pain, give me the strength to go through it.” With that prayer, I accepted His will and then the pain got too much to handle. We called Rosie. I was on my hands and knees on the floor of my bedroom with only discreet adult underwear on because I was still leaking with each contraction.

“I'm sorry I am so indecent!” Feeling so embarrassed. She said, “That's okay! I know you're in active labor!” The room was low light with only a candle on the nightstand. When Rosie saw me tense up with the pain, she said, “Look at me.” With eye contact, she helped me moan low through the pain. I thought, “Oh goodness, this is so weird!” Even Peter was joining in, and the weirdest thing, it worked!

We tried many positions to help cope with the pain from side-lying, to the shower, hands and knees while Peter helped with the back labor by pressing his thumbs where the pain was, the toilet where Rosie pressed her hand against my forehead, and tub. What was really nice during those moments was not having to think about what position I needed to be in. I was up for anything to help. She had me try to drink and eat during those moments which chewing anything was so difficult because all my muscles were so tense. I couldn't even put my mouth over the lip of my Snapple drink.

Suddenly, I started to feel pushy. “I think I feel pushy.” I said breathless. Rosie said, “Do you want to go to the hospital?” I hesitated because I was going through a contraction, but then it went away and I quickly said, “Yes.” I got down the first flight of stairs, where the kitchen table and living room was. Had a contraction, then got to the garage where the car was. All our hospital supplies were in the back and I quickly threw them into the trunk. Then had a contraction before getting into the car.

Peter drove so fast and during the drive I had maybe three contractions. When we got to the emergency room around 2 in the morning, I got out of the car and saw this bloody clot come out. Rosie said, “That's your bloody show! You're getting close!” I saw a male nurse outside the emergency room doors and he said, “Do you want a wheel chair?” I said, “No, I am going to walk.” I had a contraction in the emergency room hallway. Made it to the elevator then had a contraction in the maternity ward. Finally, I made it to my room.

They put on the belt monitors and when they checked me to see how far along I was, I was only 5 centimeters. I felt blessed not knowing and that they only told Rosie and Peter. Rosie didn't worry. She told Peter, every mother who drives to the hospital will close up but once they are settled they will open again once comfortable. Once I got in the room, the contractions felt back to back. Not stopping. It was so hard. I tried the tub, but Peter couldn't get his thumbs where the pain was. I helplessly said, “I want an epidural! I can't do this!” He said, “Do you really want an epidural?” I said, “Yes! No! I don't know!” I'm so thankful they didn't give me one.

Rosie then said, “Let's try this. Go in the bathroom with Peter and have a moment in there.” I thought, “Why? That's weird.” So, I listened and sat on the toilet with him holding my head in his hands. I later on realized the oxytocin from being alone with my husband increased the contractions more. I said, “Nope, can't be in here anymore!” I got out of there so fast. Then Rosie said, “Let's do the walcher's technique. Get on the bed and lay down and dangle your legs down off.” I did this through a contraction. Felt so agonizingly painful. I got up after the contraction and then she did a lift and tuck where she lifted up my stomach and put it down. My water broke fully splashing Peter's flipflops.

I walked around to the left side of the bed and reached over to Peter on the other side holding his hands. “It hurts! It's hurts!” I cried out through tears. Then they tried to take my blood. “I can't! I am contacting!” I yelled out. Then it went away slightly. “Okay, hurry!” I barked. I was annoyed because they already took my blood the first time I went to the hospital. I got on my hands and knees and then finally the nurse said, “You are ready to push!” I said, “Really?! Really?!” I couldn't believe it.

My contractions started to space out more and I realized that they connected along with each push. I started to push and rocked with each push. “Saying, come out Paxton. We are doing this together. Come out Paxton!” I didn't focus on myself. Only on my sweet baby boy. The nurse said, “Don't rock, barrel down.” I don't know what I was doing so I listened, but later I realized that rocking and listening to my body, I was doing it just right. Then the nurse said, “Don't scream. You will expel more energy.” I thought, “How can I not scream?” So, I pinched off my throat and held it until I stopped pushing and then released it with a grunt.

I started to feel a burning sensation which I remembered was the ring of fire and thought, “Oh, so that is what that feels like.” Finally, I heard Peter say, “I see hair, I see an eye, I see a nose!” Then everyone started chanting, “PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!” I felt a release and his body came out. After they cleaned out his throat, I heard his first cry which was the most beautiful sound I heard. Then they put him through my legs and I held him close to me saying over and over again, “My Paxton. My Paxton.” I was so relived. I cried and thanked Rosie through tears.

I smelled his bloody dark brown hair. I loved his newborn smell that I didn't want to wash him off. I wanted to saver it in those moments. With time, I realized I wanted everyone to have the same joy that Rosie gave me in my birth experience. I felt so empowered that I did it the way that God intended and inspired me to become a doula to bring God's light through their birth because with Him, all things are possible.

“I sought the Lord and He answered me. He delivered me from all my fears” — Psalm 34:4

-Cassidy Kemper
Owner of Your Light Doula Services (2 on earth, 4 in eternity)

After 18 months with my son Paxton and a hard year of miscarriages, I finally got pregnant with my daughter. I was cautious and a bit scared where I should have been overjoyed. It was around December of 2024 when I figured out. During the first week of advent, I took a nap with Paxton and as I woke up, I saw two rainbows behind my white bed frame. I thought, “How are these two rainbows coming through my window?” I had black out curtains that I thought covered most of the sunlight coming through. Then, a voice inside my heart said, “You will have another baby again.” I started to cry knowing that the one rainbow was for Paxton and the other for my baby girl.

The pregnancy was a lot tougher than Paxton. I started to have fears of losing her because I had some bleeding early on and was given progesterone which helped to keep her alive. I had a doctor in the beginning but after knowing that she was going to be okay, I decided to go with my midwife Annie Higdon and do a home birth. I would get sick with her more often with a lot of heartburn. The aches and pains felt stronger as well the second time around which I learned your body stretches more with each pregnancy which can cause more pain than the last.

At 38 weeks, I started to have constant Braxton-Hicks contractions and I kept thinking that she must be coming soon or my labor would be easier. She came a week early while with Paxton I was a week late. My labor started similar with my water breaking in the morning and gradually increased throughout the day. My mother came to support me and I tried to pretend that the contractions were not there. I had my appointment with my midwife Annie at 2 o'clock the same day and she asked if I was having any contractions. I told her yes. After the appointment, she said call me when it starts really picking up.

After having some sushi my husband Peter got me, I couldn't hide my pain anymore. I was breathing through the pain that wouldn't last more than 30 seconds and then go away. My mom has so much nervous energy I thought it was hilarious. “You are here just to torture me, are you?” I laughed even harder. “You are making labor more enjoyable.” I told her bust out laughing. Once it was starting to get 4 minutes apart, I had to start moaning through the pain. Peter called Annie and she said the contractions were not lasting for a minute, but they were getting closer. So he said, “She really needs you now.”

I decided to go into the shower. I prayed, “God please help me get through this.” As the water was running down the front of me, I thought about my doula Rosie and how I missed her stable loving touch. I decided to call her. “Rosie! I really need you.” I said through tears. “I can't do this, without you.” Her voice was so gentle and kind. “Awe, honey, why are you crying? You can do this. Breathe, take it one at a time. I am coming. I will be there in 40 minutes.” I decided to get out of the shower and go on my hands and knees on the bed.

I was given water to drink and I was moaning through the contractions. Rosie finally arrived and I felt such a relief seeing her. My mother-in-law was also there and while Peter pressed on my hips, she gave me a cold washcloth for my head. I felt so connected with Peter that I felt one with him during those moments. Then I noticed there was a change of pressure in my vaginal area and my rectum. My voice changed from a moan to a more of a grunt. Peter said, “Is she in transition?” Annie said, “I think she is way past transition.” After another grunt, Annie said, “Are you pushy?” I told her yes.

My wrists and my ankles were starting to hurt from being on my hands and knees for so long in the shower then in the bed. Rosie suggested I change positions to the junior high dance position which was me leaning on Peter has he held me up. I stood up and pushed while bending into a squat. I felt this strong burning sensation again which I knew was the ring of fire, but it was much stronger and longer, I called it a tunnel of fire. “It's burning! It's burning! It's burning!” Next thing I knew, after two pushes in the position she was out. Annie was able to catch her.

I was such in shock as I held her tiny body against my chest. My mom and my mother-in-law came in. I said, “I did it mom. I did it.” My mom was getting emotional. “You did it.” She said through tears. What a blessing. I didn't have any tearing and the labor was almost a half shorter than with Paxton. My sweet Cadence. My song of praise. I couldn't believe she was here. Even though the post-partum cramping was terrible for the first 3 days, I was so happy I could hold her in my arms.

Though throughout pregnancy I prayed to not be in pain, I was thankful for all the other blessings I had during the birth. Being at home was less stressful than being at the hospital. I was comfortable in my own bed for the first night and in bliss the second night. Everything was so much better at home. I had all the people that I wanted to be there and so much support and love. God is so good. I can't thank Him enough.

“Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love is everlasting.” — Psalm 136

-Cassidy Kemper
Owner of Your Light Doula Services (2 on earth, 4 in eternity)